Selected Writings by Steve Bohlert/Subal Das


A collection of poetry and short prose written over a twenty year period. Click to email me.	Selected Writings To Radha on Her Appearance Day As a gift to you my dear queen of Braja, I lay my life at your feet. My only desire is to be your maid servant. May I always be allowed to behold your beautiful form. May I be allowed to touch you, bathe you and dress you with my love. When oh when will that day come when my desires will be fulfilled? Be kind to me and grant me your mercy soon. My heart longs for you. I cannot stand the separation. Let me join that bevy of young beauties that surround you, and help to bring about your union with your beloved Govinda. You are so merciful to even let me remember you in this way. Live in my heart always while this separation exists, and let me return to your bower soon. 2004 ❡ The Beginning “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.” In the beginning of what? In the beginning of the creation of the material universe. In the beginning of time. In the beginning of space. Before the beginning of creation, there was no time or space. There was just eternity, without beginning or end, the eternal now. There was something at the beginning. What was that something? It was the logos, it was the Word, it was God. BANG! The big bang. OM! My God, what’s going on here? What’s all this racket? The event horizon is exploding from the primal singularity. No one can explain the beginning of creation. No one was there—not scientists or religionists. It’s pure speculation, mythology. Persons want to know how creation began. Where does all this stuff come from? Science and religion, explain the unexplainable. People want to know. Yet, it’s unknowable. Give us your best shot. Give us something to hold on to. 2004 ❡ Beyond Gender Not only is God both male and female, mother and father, lover and beloved, Radha Krishna, etc., we are also all male and female in our qualities to different degrees. Certainly we have different physical qualities, esp. when it comes to our sexual makeup, but so much of the differences between the sexes is a result of breeding and cultural conditioning over the millennia. Patriarchal alpha males dominated society and created a struggle for breeding rights, power and possessions. Other males who could not compete against the alphas found an area of power and control in religion. Many of these followed the patriarchal model of dominance over women and others who did not possess the "special" knowledge they did. I believe many of them such as the apostle Paul, Augustine and others had serious psychological problems, a misogynistic attitude, hatred of "the flesh" and worldly life. I see a great difference between Jesus and Paul with Jesus being holistic and Paul out of touch with his shadow and therefore engaging in projection. Unfortunately, Paul has more of an influence on current Christianity than Jesus. As a result of all this, men are also suffering due to patriarchy. Unable to fully manifest their feminine natures, being bred and conditioned as workers, soldiers, providers, etc., they are exploited by the dominance system just as women are. Of course men have a better chance of advancement, illusion of control, etc., but at what price? The whole world is suffering under the patriarchal domination system whether it is run by Bush, Saddam, the Ayatollah or whoever. I provide an alternative vision of a male/female God-dess, equality of the sexes, removal of the artificial separation and competition of the sexes, and a more life affirming world view that respects all creatures and the planet earth. 2003 ❡ How much time has past. How much I have aged. How much I have grown. Life, the everlasting mystery, unfolds. No one knows where it goes. Help me O Radha Krishna to do your will, Live in me that I may live in you still. Let me be a blessing to all. Let your love flow through me Until I am washed clean of all dross. Let my soul awaken and rejoice In you day by day. 2002 ❡ O Krishna, lover of my soul, Embrace me with your rapturous arms. Hold me close to you, and never let me go. I am empty without you in my life. Fill me with your divine love. Make me overflow. My heart is your heart, The only one I know. I lay my life at your feet. Oh love that’s love, Ever be with me. 2002 ❡ Seeking the true light, Becoming free of categories, Emptying the mind of preconceptions, This is the task. To see what is and what is not, Being, not doing, Living, experiencing, feeling, This is the work of the self. 2002 ❡ A year has passed and so much has changed. Yet nothing has changed. My heart still longs for you. I am still weary of this world and its struggles. O Krishna, free me. Let me enter into the bliss of your presence. Give me a sign that you are with me and hear my cries. My soul longs for you. I cry out in separation. O weariness, your burden is heavy. Ease my worried mind. My heart is heavy from weeping. Give me the eyes to see you, The ears to hear you. Wipe away my tears and anoint me with joy. 2003 ❡ Love heals, love wounds, Love carries the heart away and overcomes the mind. Who is this beautiful person you’re with? Who is God? Why do you give your heart? Is it not better to steel it up? Ah, but how can one stifle the life that nourishes the soul? Remain equipoised. 1982 ❡ Life’s too long to ignore it. 1982 ❡ The Conundrum Attempting to explain the unexplainable. Ravel out the circumstances of my life that have led me to my present situation. I’ve been to the heights of transcendental realization having lived for years as a renunciate following the path of devotion. I left the monastery, lifted the barrier of detachment that separated me from the world and entered upon the task of integrating the wisdom of the East with modern American life. Getting back in touch with my younger self and the society I left feeling an outcast, I adapt to the world around me as a traveler in time/space multi-dimensional reality. Dogma and belief are left by the wayside. No preconceptions. Beginner’s mind. I know all and know nothing. What am I doing here? How can I fulfill my mission? What exactly is that mission, and where are the rest of my kind? How can I communicate higher knowledge to these mere earthlings engaged in the day-to-day struggle for survival in a culture of gross materialism? My vision encompasses the struggles of developing human consciousness through recorded history and before. How can those who think this is the way it’s always been understand? The sun rises on another day. I’m in Ashland, Oregon. I’m in Vrindaban, India. How to make the connection? All those years as a wandering mendicant monk making my journey to the East, following my spiritual guidance, becoming absorbed in the highest transcendental realms, an eminent member of the Society, only to see it corrupted--these thoughts weigh heavy on my mind. How can I reconcile my inner life full with ancient wisdom with the reality of stayin’ alive in nuclear decay and total collapse of the '80s in America? Called back to the West by my American birth and heritage, unable to maintain a relationship with the corrupt Society, I go into the world as an alien, an outsider. How can I communicate my knowledge to these earthlings whose race I’ve been born into? How can I maintain my life on the physical plane as a married man with three kids--a promoter, a rancher, a printer, an astrologer, a grower, a restaurateur? What is the persona I shall adopt today? What is the roll I am to play? Whose writing the script around here anyway? Well, the day wears on, and I’ve got to write the bios of the actors in the play. 1983
Copyright ©2003-09 Steve Bohlert

Selected Writings

To Radha on Her Appearance Day

As a gift to you my dear queen of Braja,
I lay my life at your feet.
My only desire is to be your maid servant.
May I always be allowed to behold your beautiful form.
May I be allowed to touch you, bathe you and dress you with my love.
When oh when will that day come when my desires will be fulfilled?
Be kind to me and grant me your mercy soon.
My heart longs for you. I cannot stand the separation.
Let me join that bevy of young beauties that surround you,
and help to bring about your union with your beloved Govinda.
You are so merciful to even let me remember you in this way.
Live in my heart always while this separation exists,
and let me return to your bower soon. 2004

❡

The Beginning

“In the beginning was
the Word,
and the Word was
with God,
and the Word was
God.”
In the beginning of what?
In the beginning
of the creation
of the material universe.
In the beginning
of time.
In the beginning
of space.

Before the beginning of creation,
there was no time or space.
There was just eternity,
without beginning or end,
the eternal now.

There was something at the beginning.
What was that something?
It was the logos,
it was the Word,
it was God.

BANG!
The big bang.
OM!
My God, what’s going on here?
What’s all this racket?
The event horizon is exploding from the primal singularity.

No one can explain
the beginning of creation.
No one was there—not scientists or religionists.
It’s pure speculation, mythology.
Persons want to know how creation began.
Where does all this stuff come from?

Science and religion,
explain the unexplainable.
People want to know.
Yet, it’s unknowable.
Give us your best shot.
Give us something to hold on to. 2004

❡

Beyond Gender

Not only is God both male and female, mother and father, lover and beloved, Radha Krishna, etc., we are also all male and female in our qualities to different degrees. Certainly we have different physical qualities, esp. when it comes to our sexual makeup, but so much of the differences between the sexes is a result of breeding and cultural conditioning over the millennia.

Patriarchal alpha males dominated society and created a struggle for breeding rights, power and possessions. Other males who could not compete against the alphas found an area of power and control in religion. Many of these followed the patriarchal model of dominance over women and others who did not possess the "special" knowledge they did.

I believe many of them such as the apostle Paul, Augustine and others had serious psychological problems, a misogynistic attitude, hatred of "the flesh" and worldly life. I see a great difference between Jesus and Paul with Jesus being holistic and Paul out of touch with his shadow and therefore engaging in projection. Unfortunately, Paul has more of an influence on current Christianity than Jesus.

As a result of all this, men are also suffering due to patriarchy. Unable to fully manifest their feminine natures, being bred and conditioned as workers, soldiers, providers, etc., they are exploited by the dominance system just as women are. Of course men have a better chance of advancement, illusion of control, etc., but at what price?

The whole world is suffering under the patriarchal domination system whether it is run by Bush, Saddam, the Ayatollah or whoever. I provide an alternative vision of a male/female God-dess, equality of the sexes, removal of the artificial separation and competition of the sexes, and a more life affirming world view that respects all creatures and the planet earth. 2003

❡

How much time has past.
How much I have aged.
How much I have grown.
Life, the everlasting mystery, unfolds.
No one knows where it goes.

Help me O Radha Krishna to do your will,
Live in me that I may live in you still.

Let me be a blessing to all.
Let your love flow through me
Until I am washed clean of all dross.

Let my soul awaken and rejoice
In you day by day. 2002

❡

O Krishna, lover of my soul,
Embrace me with your rapturous arms.
Hold me close to you, and never let me go.
I am empty without you in my life.
Fill me with your divine love.
Make me overflow.
My heart is your heart,
The only one I know.
I lay my life at your feet.
Oh love that’s love,
Ever be with me. 2002

❡

Seeking the true light,
Becoming free of categories,
Emptying the mind of preconceptions,
This is the task.
To see what is and what is not,
Being, not doing,
Living, experiencing, feeling,
This is the work of the self. 2002

❡

A year has passed and so much has changed.
Yet nothing has changed.
My heart still longs for you.
I am still weary of this world and its struggles.
O Krishna, free me.
Let me enter into the bliss of your presence.
Give me a sign that you are with me and hear my cries.
My soul longs for you.
I cry out in separation.
O weariness, your burden is heavy.
Ease my worried mind.
My heart is heavy from weeping.
Give me the eyes to see you,
The ears to hear you.
Wipe away my tears and anoint me with joy. 2003

❡

Love heals, love wounds,
Love carries the heart away and overcomes the mind.
Who is this beautiful person you’re with?
Who is God?
Why do you give your heart?
Is it not better to steel it up?
Ah, but how can one stifle the life that nourishes the soul?
Remain equipoised. 1982

❡

Life’s too long to ignore it. 1982

❡

The Conundrum

Attempting to explain the unexplainable. Ravel out the circumstances of my life that have led me to my present situation. I’ve been to the heights of transcendental realization having lived for years as a renunciate following the path of devotion.

I left the monastery, lifted the barrier of detachment that separated me from the world and entered upon the task of integrating the wisdom of the East with modern American life.

Getting back in touch with my younger self and the society I left feeling an outcast, I adapt to the world around me as a traveler in time/space multi-dimensional reality.

Dogma and belief are left by the wayside. No preconceptions. Beginner’s mind. I know all and know nothing.

What am I doing here? How can I fulfill my mission? What exactly is that mission, and where are the rest of my kind? How can I communicate higher knowledge to these mere earthlings engaged in the day-to-day struggle for survival in a culture of gross materialism?

My vision encompasses the struggles of developing human consciousness through recorded history and before. How can those who think this is the way it’s always been understand?

The sun rises on another day. I’m in Ashland, Oregon. I’m in Vrindaban, India. How to make the connection? All those years as a wandering mendicant monk making my journey to the East, following my spiritual guidance, becoming absorbed in the highest transcendental realms, an eminent member of the Society, only to see it corrupted--these thoughts weigh heavy on my mind. How can I reconcile my inner life full with ancient wisdom with the reality of stayin’ alive in nuclear decay and total collapse of the '80s in America?

Called back to the West by my American birth and heritage, unable to maintain a relationship with the corrupt Society, I go into the world as an alien, an outsider. How can I communicate my knowledge to these earthlings whose race I’ve been born into? How can I maintain my life on the physical plane as a married man with three kids--a promoter, a rancher, a printer, an astrologer, a grower, a restaurateur? What is the persona I shall adopt today? What is the roll I am to play? Whose writing the script around here anyway?

Well, the day wears on, and I’ve got to write the bios of the actors in the play. 1983